school is such a drag. especially for me. but i really had weird thoughts today. about life and death...o.O; freaky. i mostly thought about my friends. why? because i'm thankful i have some this year. for a while, i've lived a friendless life. now, i've got Justin, Laura, Jess, other Jess, and a couple more. but...i can't help but wonder. for how long? Justin is only 10, so i don't think he knows how to be an asshole. >.< unfortunately, most do. so corrupted the young ones of today, including myself. i hate to be dumping woes on this blog again, but what the heck. i'm depressed right now.
depressing thoughts: a couple of weeks ago, no probably a month, i was down at my friend Jessie's house. Then, Justin and Jess's little brother came. We were running around acting like idiots. then, for some reason, me and jess got pissy with one another. she walked off down the road and i sat down on the road side, feeling crappy. suddenly, justin sits down right next to me. this surprised me because weren't friends...really. he asked me if i was ok. if it were the right moment, i would have cried right then and there. that was the first time EVER a person, a stranger, cared about me. i just said i was fine and cheered up a bit. ever since then, h'e's been my best bud. i just hope that he feels the same way. ok, now i'm going to go do my homework and listen to the radio. bye
Something strange happened to me today. Just a few minutes ago, to be accurate. I went into my kitchen to get a snack, like i usually do before bed. I passed the sink, full of dishes. I knew my mom would be angry in the morning if i didn't do them, but i had second thoughts. I said, very lazily, why should i bother? I never get thanked enough. What would i get in return? I went over to the microwave and heated up my snack. As i did, i kept thinking of weird things. Such as, the book i'm reading. she said yes is a very saddening biography of a Collunbine student who died as a teen martyer, written by her own mother. It was so emotional, sometimes i almost cried.
I began to think: How many times do people stop and do what's right? How many times does a person stop to help another person, even a stranger? How many times do we stop and be grateful for things we take for granted? Like...living? I never stopped to think about giving my mom a hand. I never stopped to think if my mom suddenly died, would i regret not helping her when i could? I pressed the stop button on my microwave and went over to the sink and did the dishes. I think God was telling me something. And i'm thankful cause i'm probably only one of 5,000 who stop to to the moral thing. I'll go to bed with clear thoughts tonight.
ah, i needed a topic and there it is. my little friend named justin. little cause he's 10, shorter than pat m. at my school and is quite childish. OF COURSE, he's cooler than any other kid mind you. that's why he's my friend XD his nickname is Smalls cause he looks like a person in a movie and the character was named Smalls
reasons i hang with him:
obessessed with fire. we started lots behind jessie's(my best bud) barn. one time we tried to set a dead duck on fire. no avail sadly...
he skateboards. so do i. that doesn't mean we skateboard WELL.
has a twisted mind like the lot of us
lives across the street and down a house from Jessie
loves to laugh.
we(me, my sis, jessie, her bro james, and justin) love to play hide and go seek in the barn. kinda weird since we're all 12-14 years old, no including justin. anyways, one time we were running from brandon, jessie's youngest little brother and me and justin were in the loft. we were talking about something stupid when he told me of the michael jackson thing on the radio: "look at the tent we made"
OMFG, we were laughing hysterically over that. when we came out of the barn to look for everyone else, he kept saying "becky, guess what?" "What?" "look at the tent we made."
and trust me, he WOULD NOT shut up...>.<; my brain still hurts...lol but there's nothing like a good friend to make a day better. he even stayed with me on the wall when i got depressed and mad at jess. to me, he's my closest friend beside Sammy...too bad he's not my age and goes to my school. *sigh* i go see if he's home now....
i don't know why i just thought of this, days away from going into 8th grade. back in 7th grade, we had to watch a movie in religion called 'The Song of Bernadet". it was ok, for a religion movie. it even caught my attention...but i noticed something....we were about to finish the movie when we had to pause it for some reason or another. I raised my hand and i asked my teacher "This is called the SONG of Bernadette...where's her song?" so far, the movie had no one singing. this really ticked me off for some reason. my teacher just laughed and said she didn't know. we continued to watch it and at the end, church bells were ringing. my teacher mocked my question playfully and said "there's your song becky." but dang it! that's not enuogh for my odd little mind! WHERE THE HECK IS THE SONG??!!! grrr...i don't know why i get so worked up about it, but it sure bugs the heck out of me...
and for my own little updates...i was posting on AC and everyone loved my poems!!! ^.^ **ish so happy** i love poems...especially ones where it tis dark and sad. people think i'm happy a lot and don't like the darkness. the truth is, i prefer the darkness and i never really get happy. >.> people just need to look farther than masks. or that i'm a REALLY good actress. either way, i suddenly feel depressed...um...g2g, i got to clean my room. ja ne(japanese for 'see ya')
Hiya, name's Becky. ^.^ Just a random anime fan...but for all you otakus...i am having YAMI troubles. believe it or not, i got a yami or dark side. >.< And Nanashi, which i call it, has been up to no good! Never talks to me except that one night and that gave me a near heart attack. I'm dubbing it a girl. Anyway, she made me blank out when my mom told me to do something and i didn't know. then my mom went on a rampage, saying that i always "forget" things on purpose! right now, i really hope nanashi will talk to me again so i can scream at her.
But on a happier note, i managed to work on my new site, Subtle Ice! Not my layout, but as soon as my Corel PHOTO-PAINT starts to work again, i'll have my own layout. I'm getting better at making those things lol. I just wish i could make a layout for THIS blog. Ah well, i got to go. Sites to make, yamis to punish...my list is busy today! ^__~ Ja ne!
